THE EGGNOG doberman 
By Russ Barnes
It was the day before Christmas and peace and quiet reigned in the household. The boarders in the kennel had been fed and exercised and were bedded down until their next exercise period. I groomed two appointment dogs in the morning. One client in her way of thanking me for taking her dog in for grooming the day before Christmas presented me with a bottle of brandy. After she left I stored the bottle in the hutch with other liquors that had accumulated over time.
A little later Sandy asked me if I’d care to have eggnog. She got out the bottle and making up the drinks at the kitchen counter. She had bought two or three cups for this occasion. The cups were stainless material similar to a coffee cup, or mug with handle, but with a large open top. She measured out one shot or so of brandy, filled with the eggnog and a sprinkle of nutmeg.
I happened to be sitting next to a table while Sandy was sitting next to the coffee table. For a moment she got up to fiddle with something at the lighted Christmas tree ignoring her drink. I was reading some mail. She was away from her drink for maybe ten seconds and when she returned to her chair she noticed her drink had vanished. Eying our Doberman, Mesu, she was still licking her chops. Of course, we both knew that Mesu had devoured Sandy’s drink in a flash.
Oh well, Sandy returned to the kitchen and made another one with the usual shot or so of brandy. This time she got up again from her chair to fiddle with the Closed Caption on the TV. It took another three seconds to return to her chair. Lo and behold the second drink had mysteriously vanished. Mesu again licking her chops and looking quite satisfied. Sandy said surely Mesu will be sick. So we let it pass. There wasn’t any yelling or shouting at Mesu, after all, she’s only eighteen months old.
About thirty minutes had passed and again Sandy asked if Mesu was going to be sick. I looked at Mesu and said no, but she’s sure acting stupid. The liquor was surely taking effect. She attempted to play with Juno and no interest there. She came over to bother me for a while and then to Sandy and neither of us paid any attention to her.
I think a shot is what, two ounces, three ounces? I asked Sandy how much did she put in those cups. She said to me, she didn’t know as she poured in the cups straight from the bottle, no shot glasses. Let’s say Mesu threw down an unmeasured amount of about six to seven ounces of good brandy and still standing. I let her out and she was back in within ten minutes. Normally, I’d have to call her in. She started pacing. I asked her what she wanted. Her response was a tail wag. Do you need a nappy? OK, nap it is and she leaped up on my bed and in seconds she was out cold. Mesu remained in a deep sleep for about two hours. Wakened, she appeared normal, no hangover signs. I asked her if she wanted an aspirin for her headache, a tail wag.
So there you have it. She’s at my feet in her favorite place when I do my computer work, under the bench. She’s none the worse and as lovable as ever. I think maybe the next time we’ll settle for root beer.
You can click on any of the titles below to read the essay:
The Doberman and Cowboy ·
September 11 ·
Max the Rescue
· Paws Claws Scales and Tails
· Winter of 2006
· Mesu
· The Eggnog Doberman
· Dolphie